Two weeks ago, seven of my colleages at work were laid off and a seeming army of new specialists were brought in to completely remake the tech department. Since then virtually every contractor has also had their contract terminated, including one developer I have become good friends with and of whom I think the world. Today another eleven coworkers were laid off, including some people I was very close to.
Two weeks ago I was the Manager of Global Technology Development Continuity. Today I don't know what the heck I am.
On Sunday I fly back to Seattle to spend a week working onsite at a company where I have worked for seven years in a department filled with virtual strangers.
Over the last week I grew increasingly worried about my job, and scared the heck out of my wife in the process. I have now been reassured that I do indeed still have a long term future with the company, and I believe those assurances for as much as they are worth. That leaves me with a profound feeling of "survivor's guilt". The he'll of it is that on the whole I agree with the decisions being made. I believe in them even though they put my position at risk. I see a much better chance now that we will actually deliver the product we need to with the quality it needs to have. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, and I only hope I am still around to walk into that light six months from now.
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